Archive for May, 2013

May 10, 2013

Colonoscopy – the finale

Off to bed at 11pm after downing all the foul liquids. I was actually too scared to go to sleep in case I woke up in a puddle. By the morning I was so tired and ropable about the whole process that I swore I’d never had another colonoscopy if my life depended on it. It is so invasive, and makes you feel so helpless and have no control over what you’re doing. Once the process is started there is no going back. The deprivation of food, the headaches through lack of water (hard to believe when you drink so much liquid), the time it takes just waiting around. It is just something I would never want to go through again.

I nearly overslept this morning and missed my appointment. As it happened I got there on time but then waited an hour to be called. It is mass production colonoscopies and endoscopies. There were people coming and going the whole time.  You wait in the waiting room to be called. Then you are taken to another room to talk to the nurse and get changed into a gown. Then you wait again to talk to the doctor. And again you wait to go to go to theatre. The staff were lovely especially when the intravenous drip did not work, they fiddled with it, it really hurt and I started to cry. I was really at the end of my tether by then. The anaesthetist held my hands to comfort me and the IV in the other hand worked. I swear I had just closed my eyes and then I was wheeled into recovery. It was all over!

I got comfy in a big reclining armchair and had a couple of cups of tea and biscuits and cheese. It was the first food I’d had since 12 noon yesterday (9 May). Then the waiting game started again, this time for the doctor. While I waited I listened to the other patients around me talking about their lives. They were all male. The patient next to me said his process was fine and he hadn’t suffered at all. I mentioned my experience was quite different. I suppose everybody’s experiences are different. This is just my view.

The doctor came and told me everything was fine. No problems. Which leaves me with the problem I had in the first place. If it recurs will I need more tests?

I only had a vague idea of what a colonoscopy was when my doctor said I should have one. Plenty of people I know have had them including my mother and brother. Perhaps I should have been a little more sympathetic towards them. I know I will be in future.

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May 9, 2013

Colonoscopy – take 3

By 7.30pm I was ready to pack it all in. This process sucks something shocking. If I wanted to get diarrhoea I would have eaten something dodgy. At least I would have eaten something that I wanted to! Not eating and having diarrhoea is just not fair. I see (read: feel) what they mean about a sore backside now. Not much chance to do anything but drink and run. A good night’s sleep is seriously not looking great at the moment. It’s nearly 8pm and I am still not finished that litre of foul liquid. Not a lot of time to drink when you’re running for the toilet.

In a bit of a lull at the moment. Still pouring down the evil liquid. Not finished yet and it’s nearly 8.30pm. Another dose due at 9pm. Will really be glad when this is over. There must be a better way!

So much for the lull! It sneaks up on you. No squeezing bum cheeks together any more, just doesn’t work. I also have a headache which is not helping my frame of mind. I’ve already paid out on my husband for joking about it. My sense of humour today is zilch. Even Ben, my cat, has got the flick. Usually he can soothe my nerves but not today.

Well it’s 9pm and I have a small glass to go. Then another 250ml of the other foul liquid and then I’m done. Hopefully things settle down and I don’t have to get up during the night.

Just gone 10pm and I’ve finished guzzling the foul liquid – finally. Things seem to have quietened down a bit – for which I’m very grateful. Let’s hope the actual colonoscopy does its job and finds out what’s wrong with me. We shall see . . .

May 9, 2013

Colonoscopy is still a dirty word!

I managed to sip the foul liquid all down. Wasn’t too bad in a weak sport drink/lemon cordial kind of way. That was the easy part. Spent the next couple of hours trying get my mind off what was coming by making a necklace. So far, so good.

Uh oh, here it comes. By 5.30pm the nasty elixir was doing its job. On to the big guns. One whole litre of disgusting liquid to consume. I really hope this test reveals some answers for my problem! It would be terrible to go through it for no result.

It’s now 7pm and I have been sipping for a whole hour. Don’t even think I’m through half of it. Sucking on barley sugar helps  – a bit but not much. And there’s another dose before bedtime at 9pm! Hope I can actually get some sleep tonight.

May 9, 2013

Colonoscopy is a dirty word!

When my doctor recommended I have a colonoscopy for a recurrent stomach problem I thought okay I can do this. You just have to drink loads of a foul liquid the day before then get knocked out for the procedure. Don’t you?

Was I in for a rude shock! Two days before the procedure you need to modify your diet. Low fibre (no wholemeal, brown, rye, multigrain bread or cereals and seeds). Back to that tasteless sponge – white bread. I haven’t eaten white bread in years. All my instincts are saying nooooo, I don’t want to do this.  No yellow (i.e. tasty) cheese. Limit (what does that mean?) vegetables and fruit. You are allowed egg, steamed white fish, boiled (boiled!?) chicken, white pasta and white rice. There seems to be a white theme here. What is that all about?

But wait there’s more! On the day before the test you can have a light breakfast and a light lunch. Light meaning meagre. Stewed fruit (what happened to limiting fruit?), poached egg or clear soup (a stock cube in hot water or maybe Bonox in hot water for variety!). No bread or cereal. That’s it for the day (and night). No more ‘food’ or milk products.

After ‘lunch’ only approved clear fluids* are allowed besides the sachet of white (again) powder in a glass of water around 3pm. After you down that, guess what? You have to drink a glass of water or approved clear liquid to wash it down, I suppose. This is the stage I am up to now. Down to the nitty gritty. Just waiting for ‘things’ to happen. In one set of instructions I read they recommend baby wipes for your backside if things get a bit sore. This is not looking good. Hope it doesn’t go that far.

The instructions also say it could take one to three hours for the white powder to do its job. What? In three hours time I have to drink another dose of stuff mixed into one whole litre of water in one whole hour. I struggle to drink a litre of water over a whole day. This will not be easy.

Pardon me while I sip this foul liquid.

To be continued . . . 

*Water, apple juice, pear juice, plain (plain?) jelly, lemon/lime jelly, black tea and coffee, Bonox, lemonade, Lucozade, lemon cordial, lime cordial, carbonated beverages (no red or purple-what flavour is purple?-colourings), clear broth, barley sugar.